My New Friday Anthem

I FREAKING LOVE the Glee version of Friday by Rebecca Black. It's HAPPY and uplifting and makes me smile. So I'm sharing it with you, my little friends.

You might think I'm a little late getting this anthem posted today but I say au contraire, ma soeur! It's 5:30 and that means my Friday, and the kick-off to my weekend, is JUST BEGINNING. 

My boys are home from their impromptu camping trip and my husband is preparing dinner as I type. I'm looking forward to fun with my guys, good BBQ, and a cold (adult) beverage.

*sigh* 

Is there anything better in the world than the start of the weekend??

It’s Friday, Friday
Gotta get down on Friday
Everybody’s lookin’ forward to the weekend, weekend
Friday, Friday
Gettin’ down on Friday
Everybody’s lookin’ forward to the weekend

Partyin’, partyin’ (Yeah)
Partyin’, partyin’ (Yeah)
Fun, fun, fun, fun
Lookin’ forward to the weekend

Happy Friday! Have a wonderful weekend, mes petits amis. 

Note: I didn't actually retain any French that I "learned" in high school. I just have a fascination with Google's Language Tools.

Amy Winehouse (Warning: F-bomb)

 

Live.

Official video. 

I love this one too.

RIP Amy. 

 

Flashback Friday - the Cruisers edition

When I was young I used to hang out at my best friend, Erin's, house across the street and watch the movie Eddie & the Cruisers over and over. AND over. We would lay on the floor in front of the TV in her parents' family room and people had to step over us to get through the room. Erin used to push the buttons on the VCR with her toes. Odd the things we remember, isn't it? 

Anyway, I loved the movie then and I still do now. Here are some clips for you: 

If you haven't seen it then I fully recommend watching it some Sunday afternoon when it's raining, the kids are sleeping or gone, and you're feeling a little introspective. And drool over Michael Pare in tight jeans and leather jackets (long before he turned into the asshole, cheating husband in Hope Floats). Note: the Eddie & the Cruisiers sequel isn't even a fraction as good as the first one, but it does tell you what in the hell happened after the somewhat ambiguous end to the first one. Personally I LIKE the ambiguity; I don't need to know the whole mundane story. But maybe that's just me. 

Enjoy! Happy Friday & glorious 3-day weekend, peeps!

Friday Night Q&A

In the immortal words of Hammerstein:

Getting to know you,
Getting to know all about you.
Getting to like you,
Getting to hope you like me.

Okay, now that that ear worm is firmly embedded in your brain, let's move on to the Q&A/getting to know you section of our blog today. (Ours, today, because I would like your participation. Yes, YOU).

I'm pretty sure only about 3 people are reading my blog but let's play a game and find out. I'll answer some questions (completely random and made up by yours truly) and you answer them back to me in a comment, okay?

Here we go:

Q. What's that one song that, no matter what, always stays in your top 5 favorites?

A. I love music. I do. I'm not one to pro-actively go hunt down new music and what I listen to is far from esoteric. To me, it's all about the emotion the music provokes; it could be because that's the song I danced to in 8th grade at the Y dances while getting my heart broken by my first crush (Love Bites by Def Leppard), or something newer that tugs at the heart strings (almost anything by Adele). So - since 7th grade I have LOVED Just Like Heaven by The Cure. Even when I went through my country music phase.

Confession: I even thought Robert Smith was hot once upon a time.

Newsflash: he's not.

Q. Think back to your life and identify a crossroads, a decision you made that altered the course of your life. If you had chosen the other path what would it have been?

A. The thing about crossroad-decisions is they are so impactful that it's hard to separate the decision from the effects that followed. Often one path isn't particularly better than the other - just different. For me, right around the time I got engaged to my husband I had been applying to a semester abroad program. I chose marriage, and then a job, and a family followed shortly after. If I went on the semester abroad program I likely would not have married my husband, I would not have my babies, and I would be in a very different place now. I have no idea if it would be better or not - I certainly would have had different experiences. But I also wouldn't have these cheese-monsters so how in the world can I argue with that??

Q. What do you typically do on a Friday night?

A. Friday nights are usually family nights at our house. Tonight, however, the hubby is out with friends, the kids are in bed (now - after a long Plants vs. Zombies game they needed my help with. They *asked* for help. I swear.), and these are my companions:

Some people may think this is sad. I, on the other hand, can't tell you how peaceful my house is right now or how nicely the wine is going down. Silence. Sip. Ahhh. 

(In case you were worried that I ate the whole box of cookies I must tell you that I put the cookies away just after I took this picture. Scout's honor. The wine I kept out just a teensy bit longer.)

G'night!

Don't forget your doubt

I have a story for you.

(I love to tell stories. They are the patchwork of our life-quilts). 

As you read here, I have insecurities. Those insecurities are a big part of why I haven't shared this blog with a wide audience. I'm testing the overall response, but I'm also finding my blog voice (if you know what I mean). I want to see what value, what information, what anecdotes (that are relevant), that I can share with an audience. Will I be funny/witty or serious/educational? I hope to be somewhere in between. 

I'm slightly introspective. Perhaps you can't tell.

Here's the story part. My boss and I are sort of friends. As much as bosses/employees can be that are male/female without any hanky-panky going on.

To be clear: no hanky or panky occurs - at all - ever.

I had not mentioned my blog to him. It's something I normally would have mentioned but I felt odd about it.

One of my boss's favorite activities is to psychoanalyze why people do and say the things they do. He's a student of human nature and figuring out what makes people tick is something he and I both think about and enjoy. (Woe to our co-workers, right? Ha! Not really - we're more theoretical.)

He was recently gone on a trip and we were really busy immediately before and after that so we hadn't had a chance to just chat in a while. Last week I went into his office and he said, "tell me a story." 

So, I told him. 

I told him I started this blog last year and how I felt about it. I told him about Joni's blog and how it had influenced me (good and bad) and I told him about connecting with Joni and the blog she wrote on sisterhood.

So my boss said to me, "Why are you so nervous about this? You're telling me this very hesitantly. Why?" Why, indeed?

Well, because I don't want to be judged! I am trying to get over that though. I mean, part of blogging is being real, right? Putting yourself out there - telling stories - and hoping they resonate with other people. I need to be brave and stop worrying about being judged. I'm trying.

In the end my boss was very encouraging. He pushed me to keep doing it and to really think about an overall message. What I want to convey. What's the point to my stories. Confound the man. (Let's see: empowerment, honesty, sisterhood? I'm thinking along these lines. Work in progress. Moving on.) 

The next day when my boss came in to work he sent me the following lyrics to an Avett Brothers' song, Weight of Lies:

I once heard the worst thing
A man could do is draw a hungry crowd
Tell everyone his name in pride and confidence
But leave out his doubt

He said he had been thinking about how Joni's blog made me feel and then what Joni had written about in regard to sisterhood. He said he went back and listened to this song and the words clicked. 

We should show our insecurities as well as our strengths. Be real. We can't create an emotional connection through shared experiences without admitting our insecurities and our doubts. Everybody has them and that is where we have the power to bond.

So this is my promise to you: I will always be real.

(And I'll work on being brave too).

Redefining white knights

The older I get the more I see that life is about the moments. I'm having one right now and I love it. I'm sitting in my darkened office looking out the window. It's an overcast day but that suits me fine. I'm listening to Train, "Marry Me." This has the same effect on me as listening to Taylor Swift's "Love Story." I get all gooey and warm inside and revert back to that 16 year old girl waiting for the fabled Prince Charming on his white horse. This makes me think of a flurry of pop culture-ish quotes:

Charlotte from Sex & the City:

I've been dating since I was fifteen! I'm exhausted! Where is he?

Faith Hill, "This Kiss":

All I wanted was a white knight with a good heart, soft touch, fast horse

I think, ladies, that those of us that have been married for more than a couple years know that there is no white knight to come in and save the day. Life isn't about being rescued, and if you are depending on a man to save you, support you, and buy you bon-bons you are on a collision course with reality and will soon be landing smack on your face.

I don't know what I expected marriage to be like when I got married at 25, but it wasn't a white knight to make it all better. I expected a partnership and equal division of labor (being somewhat of a feminist, if you want to use that term) with a lot of love. (Picture: vacuuming and dusting together, gardening together, folding laundry - together). I was in love in a way I hadn't been before. It was a powerful meeting of the minds (and other things) and it happened very, very fast. We finished each others thoughts. We were different enough that we complemented each other; we were alike enough that we often enjoyed the same things. When people ask, "how did you know" the answer was, and is, always, "We just knew."

July 14, 2000

Next month is 12 years since we started dating. I'm still in love - but it has changed so much. We have grown together. We still love some of the same things and we both still have our own separate passions. I think I lost myself for awhile but for the past few years I've been fighting to get myself back. To remember again what *I* like - flavors, scents, music, things to do and read, etc. I lost myself from being a mom & wife, but as I get to know myself again I think that only makes our marriage stronger. He likes my strong & sassy side. (Sometimes more than others).

We still argue and bicker and get our feelings hurt. But I don't think it's like it used to be; we aren't so self-righteous now. We've been through some things now and, for me at least, I see that nothing is ever black & white.

It's all about the moments.

I took today off from work. This morning I pulled on a jacket and shoes over my PJ's to drive my oldest to school while the hubby drove our youngest (they go to separate schools due to the Autism thing). I had just pulled into the garage and was turning my car off when my cell phone rang.

The hubby, "did you go straight home?"

Me, "yes, I'm in my PJ's."

Hubby, "I'm going to get you some Starbucks since, you know, it's a special day. Do you want cold or hot?"

Me, "hot please."

That's MY white knight.